I'm free!!!

Ok, so there was one more AMAZING thing that happen this weekend, and well, I believe that it deserves it's very own post...

A little while ago, I wrote on my blog, and I wrote about a sense of anxiety because I knew something was going to happen, and I didn't know what. Well, now I know what it is, and all I can say is "HECK YAH! AMEN TO THAT! WOOHOO!"

You see, as the circumstances of this past week unfolded, I've had several indepth conversations with my friend Jay that got me thinking about a few things. One particular struggle came to the forefront, something I've been wrestling with for about about a year now. It relates to some mixed emotions about some events that happen in my life that I had a hard time letting go of. (I know this is very cryptic, but I'm not airing the dirty laundry in public). Since then I've had to struggle with some major feelings of hurt and confusion. In our talks this week, Jason convicted me to take a stand - if I was trying to deny what I had to do to I needed to just face it and commit to a decision. Wow.

For so long, I've been pushing this issue around in my brain, and well, it's really done more harm than good. I've been reluctant to confront my true feelings, partly out of fear and partly out of guilt. Really, the whole thing cut me so deep, my gut reaction was just to not think about it. And in not thinking about it it seeped into the very core of my being and was eating away at part of my heart. The burden just weighed there.

It's a good thing God's got a nice sense of humour, and He doesn't really hurtful things lie forever. You see, this past Sunday, I got a call from someone, someone directly related to the above confusion. It was amusing because it happened "out-of-the-blue" and conveniently in the same week as Jay's pointed statements - insert pause here and upward look to say "Tricky, very tricky!" I agreed to meet with this someone, and it was good and it was fine, and there was no pain at all, and there was no confusion at all, and I came home and I paused. And I looked up again, and I was overwhelmed with a sense of peace and freedom.

I'm free. I free of this stronghold on my life. I am free of the burden's caused and it is no longer mine to bear. I'm free of all the senseless months of pain and anguish and confusion. I have a clear head again and I'm free!

HALLELUJAH!