One word: Blonde!

That was the word I gave to my hairdresser Paul on Saturday morning when I went to get my hair coloured. I haven't been one colour for a while, and I've been wanting to get back to my original colour tendencies, so blonde it is.

Yes imagine, I was once this blonde (naturally speaking) =>
(oh, and LTK, I'm rivaling you for lovely kid hair cuts! I love the bowl look).


And here is the result of Paul's work =>
(Isn't it funny how I look very much the same as I did when I was kid...Except for the whole chest deal, of course...)

I wanna be a supermodel!

Sometimes it's just worthwhile to get a chance to dress up and have some fun. Usually I just do it for me, but on Friday I got to do it for an even better reason - I was a model in the fashion that happened at the One by One art show that my good friends TF and Roshan helped organize. It was a really fun time. I had my makeup and hair done up in a very over the top supermodel kind of way, and I got to wear a few fun outfits from a great store you should all check out called Freedom Clothing. (It's located just past Long and McQuade at Bloor and Ossington).

So, what did I get to wear in front of everyone? (And it was a great turn out!) Well, I'm lacking on the picture front right now (I forgot my camera, so I'm rely on other peoplee's pics). I will try to describe things anyway. My first outfit was a light pink slip silk-screened skirt and black t-shit with detailing. I wore that with pink pump and matching pink belt. Outfit two was a lovely orange/patterned dress that had an empire waist and long A-line skirt. The best feature was the back with consisted only of ribbons that crossed at the back. This was worn with fun green heels. The third outfit was a black vintage satiny skirt with pinky red lace at the bottom paired with a black tube top and finished off with a cute pink fuzzy cropped top. Finished with pink pumps. And my last outfit was a halter top and matching "boy undies" that were red with black stars and black lace accents. As Borat would say "Very nice!'

All in all, it was good night. The art was good, the show was good, and it was really fun. Thanks Esther for letting me be a supermodel for the night! Thanks to the wardrobe ladies! And thanks to all the show organizers and all the guests!

OHHHH!!! Wait p.s. - Got a great additional story for the night. I was kind of caught off guard, but I finally got to do something I've been trying to for almost a year - I got to meet Cathy Keenan a.k.a. Liz O'Rourke from Degrassi. (If you don't know the character, look for a profile here). WOW! This made my half-decade at least. Yeah, Cathy works with my friend Luke and he's been trying to help me meet her for ages and it finally came to fruition. She's really nice, and even told me that I could meet her again. Hopefully next time I will have my camera and can put the details on the blog. WOO!

Congratulations Daniel!

One of the greatest things ever has just happened to a friend of mine! He got into to Stratford! For an actor in Canada, that's huge! Wow. Congrats again!

I'm so proud of you!

With toes at the edge of the cliff

A moment has arrived. I was walking the sometimes bumpy and windy path towards my goal in the hopes of having passed many hurdles. Today I have cause to pause and choose to awaken to the next big leap. The path has led me to a cliff, and I am standing on the edge with my toes floating partially into the abyss of uncertainty.

And I am having trouble moving.

I have run along a few side paths trying to avoid the cliff, but I will not go down to the valley of the shadow of death, and I want to reach the victorious mount on the other side. I can no longer ignore my choice.

And I am having trouble moving.

I teeter, I shrink back from the edge, tears welling up in my eyes. The next step is my responsibility and I cannot stay on the edge forever. The burden of choice lies upon my shoulder and it is becoming heavier every day. Like Atlas, I am carrying the world.

And I am having trouble moving.

Part of me know that if I jump to hastility I could fall to the dreaded valley. Part of me knows that if I make the right move I will find the not so visible but secure stairway that will guide me upwards. I just need a little faith.

And I am trembling.

And I am watching my toes.

And I lift my first foot...

Proverbial girl

A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.
Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value.
She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life.
She gets up while it is still dark;
she provides food for her family
and portions for her servant girls.
She sets about her work vigourously;
her arms are strong for her tasks.
She opens her arms to the poor
and extends her hands to the needy.
Her husband is respected at the city gate,
where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
She is clothed in strength and dignity;
she can laugh at the days to come.
She speaks with wisdom,
and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
She watches over the affairs of her household
and she does not eat the bread of idleness.
Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:
"Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all."
Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
Give her the reward she has earned,
and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

- Proverbs 31: 11-12, 15, 17, 20, 23, 25-31

Evil Dead goes to Broadway!

Written by Richard Ouzounian of the Toronto Star including correction. Pictures are from the Montreal Mirror.

Evil Dead has life on Broadway; Fall slot for show born at Tranzac Club T.O team tore idea from '80s horror film

The dead are going to sing and dance on Broadway.

Expect an announcement from Manhattan today that Evil Dead the Musical will open there on Nov. 1 at New World Stages on W. 50th St.

This Canadian tuner is based on the 1980s cult horror films of Sam Raimi and first reached a stage at the Tranzac Club in the summer of 2003, winding up at the Just for Laughs Festival in Montreal the following year.

It was written by George Reinblatt, Christopher Bond and Frank Cipolla (with additional music by Melissa Morris).

Bond, who staged the original, is co-directing it in New York with three-time Tony Award winner Hinton Battle.

Another Tony winner, set designer Paul Gallo, will bring his wacky inventiveness to this show, as he did for that other Canuck musical currently doing well on Broadway, The Drowsy Chaperone.

Well-known Toronto stage producer Jeffrey (Forever Plaid) Latimer was the first to take a serious interest in the show and he will produce it in New York, along with Jenkay LLC and Just for Laughs.

Evil Dead is the classic "horny young people in a deserted cottage" scenario, where clueless kids find themselves being slaughtered by Candarian demons on a weekend they thought was going to be devoted strictly to carnal capers.

With its buzzing chainsaws and dismembered arms, Evil Dead has enough gore to make Sweeney Todd look like Annie, but somehow it winds up being fun instead of gross.

When first reviewing it in 2003, I wrote "With a bit of work, this show could go places."

And it certainly has.

A not so jaded heart

Every now and then I like to take a moment a reflect on old thoughts and musings. Usually I do so with my journal, but today I took a moment and re-read my post on my jaded heart from last October and it's funny...I understand why I wrote what I did. In fact, I still agree with the feelings that I expressed. It's just interesting to see that there have been a few changes in my heart since then.

For instance, I wrote "My fear is that my heart will become so jaded about this one small thing, and this will bleed into all my relationships, and I will eventually close my heart."

Wow.

Since then I feel like so much of this has changed - the walls have been broken down and it's just humbling to stop and reflect on how God has healed me. It almost seems easy to say that I don't even think that my heart is closed off anymore; however, there is caution in uttering that because there is still a ways to go. I feel like I've learned how to be more open and receptive to what people say - and to accept things. The whole world isn't out to cheat me. My close friends aren't holding back from me. My jaded heart is also not the world's responsibility. Resentment doesn't come from anyone else's actions but my own. I am responsible for my own heart.

We are constantly bombarded with darkness and death and it seeks to seep into our lives like a slow acting poison. I see so clearly now that I let the hurt of the past poison my heart, and I set up walls to protect my battered inner core. But those walls did nothing else but cause me to hide like a scared little girl who fears she can never be love. Instead of protecting me, they blocked out the Light. Yet I underestimated how badly the Light wanted in, and it was strong enough to burn a little hole into the walls so that a ray could come through. And the little girl saw the Light and broke down crying because it was so much more beautiful to have a small bit of that Light than to sit in the dark. Maintaining the walls cause energy to be squandered in a wrong fashion. Light changes that. It makes the walls seem thick and unnecessary, yet paper thin and destructible.

I swear, with His eternal strength, I will rip down these walls and surround myself with Light because that is my true calling. Amen to that.

Explosion or slow burn?

What do you think is better, or even more likely of these two scenarios: falling in love at the first encounter with someone or falling in love gradually with a best friend?

I've been thinking about this lately - clearly I'm too into reading the romance in Anne of Green Gables. None the less, I'd love to hear thoughts on this. I must admit my jaded heart leans towards the second. But it's in God's hands.

All precious things discovered late
To those that seek them issue forth,
For Love in sequel works with Fate.
And draws the veil from hidden worth.
- Tennyson.

Anne of Green Gables

I must confess to you all, one of the best perks about staying at my friend Kate's place is that she is a HUGE Anne of Green Gables fan and I love it. I myself also grew up watching Megan Follows and Jonathan Crombie play Anne and Gilbert respectively whenever I could. I also grew up watching Road to Avonlea. I love the world created by Lucy Maud Montgomery.

A little while ago I thought it would be lovely to read these books, the WHOLE series, seeing as I never have. I've only had the first one read to me as a child. I figured it was about time. When I was home last month, I wanted to get the books from Mum and Dad, but of course they were still tucked away somewhere in the house, never having been unpacked after the move from Labrador. Oh well. I thought I'll just buy them. But alas - not entirely to my surprise - my friend Kate has the entire series sitting in her room, and I've taken advantage of this. I've already read Anne of Green Gables and Anne of Avonlea. I'm currently on to reading Anne of the Island. Sigh. I love every word.

Not only is it a great story full of funny little adventures, there is just something magical about Anne that you can't help but love. She's romantic and imaginative, yet strong and practical. She's got drama queenish tendancies and so much love to share. I love how she is described as having glowing eyes and an infectious personality. We could only wish to be such a type of "flame" in this world. Plus, she's Canadian, and that's really cool too! Add in a romance with a great man, one that just kinda creeps up and blooms - sigh!

All in all, it's a very inspiring story. There are elements of hope and love that really just make you want those things. To go from being a girl that no one could love to a girl so valued that she changes the lives of those around her, well, there is little worse in the world. Sigh again.

I am rock, I am an island

In the last little while, there has been a lot of change going on around me. Some of my closest and dearest anchor type friends (Nick, Ryan) have set off on new adventures. My dearest best friend is launching into a new life (SO exciting). One of my closest girl friends has a new boy, and she's not around as much. I no longer have a place to call my own because I have yet to find an apartment that isn't overpriced and crappy. Other people are thinking of moving, changing, evolving.

And I feel like a rock that isn't rolling.

I'm consistantly finding myself discouraged and encouraged all the time. I just keep going back on forth when it comes to accepting change and everything that is going on around me. I wanted things to move forward so badly, and now I just have to wait for things to fall into place and it's hard to be patient.

And I feel lonely. Like an island. Except not an island in the stream. An island that's just there. Loosing little bits of sand with every wave as if my outer foundations are slipping away from me.

At least the cross in the middle is still standing firm. Too bad I've just been sitting in it's shadow lately, staring at my toes. Maybe it's time to get to work.

girl loves boy

Just for fun, I decided to hop on the train with LTK and Jen in terms of putting up some celeb appreciation photos. Here are some boys I enjoy and some of the reasons why.

Jonathan Crombie -

best known for playing Gilbert Blythe in Sullivan Entertainment's Anne of Green Gables.

All Canadian, very charming.

How could you not love this face?

Johnny Depp -

Fantastic physical actor.

Plus he's bad ass enough to have lots of tattoos.

Ethan Embry -

Cute, curly haired and charming.

I've totally had a celeb crush on him since A Far Off Place and Empire Records.

Eric Szmanda -

Plays Greg Sanders on CSI.

Totally my fav show, totally my fav boy.

Cute and does DNA? Sigh.

Rich Franklin -

One of the most awesome fighters in the UFC.

He's been a solid champion,

Totally a Christian.

Too bad he's married.

Dominic Monaghan -

English and played one of my favourite

characters in the Lord of the Rings.

Enough said.

Colin Firth -

A little bit of an older gent, but who could

resist him as Mr. D'Arcy?

Jack Black -

Just because he's over the top.

And knows his music.

Love that.

Josh Groban -

Was my IBF (Imaginary Boyfriend).

He sings so well.

And I like boys with curly hair.

Michael Vartan -

Think of him as teacher in

Never Been Kissed.

Sam Roberts -

Canadian music hottie.

Talented too.

Billy Joe Armstrong -

A punk guy with tats and

who can pull off eyeliner.

Practical matters

I've finally finished writing about my long weekend. The post is below here, so don't miss it if you want to read about the adventures. I hope to soon add some pictures, but if not, they are on my Flickr account.

I'm slowly getting back into the blogging bit, but it's summer and evenings are being progressively spent out of doors, enjoying the city. It doesn't mean I neglect my thoughts, it's just that I tend to leave them out there somewhere. :)

Honestly Progressive

What an interesting weekend. It was a full on drama queenish weekend, plenty of angst and emotional rollercoaster moments. Well, maybe that's a slight exaggeration, but when one hasn't had some drama for a while, it kinda seems that way. This weekend was all about learning something about myself and helping a friend do the same. It's amazing how well that works. :)

You see, this weekend there was a bit of a breakdown in truly right actions between myself and a good friend, we slipped easily into a bit of a self-serving style - as in we were both a little more concerned with our own sensibilities than really thinking out how our actions were effecting the other. To admit that is sad, but necessary. But I feel that things are all the better for it. The events opened up an opportunity to do something God has long being calling me to do: to be outright and honest.

That sounds simple enough, I know, but let me stipulate that I am a girl who often with stew or brush away angers and hurts rather than confronting the issue. I like to hide at times (right, Jay?). I was convicted long ago about these actions by another good friend, and I've been really wanting to strive to be better at being honest and open in loving way to my friends. I say loving because honesty doesn't mean bluntness and rudeness, it means calling someone on wrong actions, and laying open your own wrongs. This weekend was a prime example about how sometimes things need to be flushed out and talked about. It was really good to know that it could be done, and neither of us ended up hating each other. Funny, I guess I now have the "proof" I needed that it's ok to work that way.

I feel like I'm growing up a little.

City feeling

This morning I awoke to my alarm at 5:10, and I was ready to get up and be ready for the day. I laid in bed a few more minutes, but I couldn't stay in there. I showered, used my new eye shadow (teal/navy combo from MAC, very nice), did my exercise and got dressed. Still early. Ate breakfast, made lunch, packed up, left the apartment. Decided I was a "growed up girl" today and treated myself to a Caramel Machiato from Starbucks.

I like this early morning city feeling.

A long weekend in the Muskokas

This past weekend was absolutely fantastic. My friend Rachel invited a stack of us goons from FT to come up to her family cottage for the long weekend to relax and it was such a welcome break from the city and a good time was had by all. Oh, the adventures you have when you put a bunch of guys and only three girls together. (In the end our group consisted of Rachel, Ann Marie, myself, Enoch, Karl, Justin, Rob Awesome, Rob S, and Kyle; and Rob S was afraid there would be no guys! ha!)

It all started on Friday afternoon/evening when I met up with Rachel to do some grocery shopping. In the end, I was really glad to have the day off because I needed to get settled in the house, and I was free to help with the errands. I know Rachel was glad to have a second pair of hands. Once we were all set for the weekend, we grabbed the food and headed over to Rachel to make dinner for the crew before we headed out on the road. All in all, the trip there was a success, even if Rachel was a little crazy on the steering. ;) We left between 9:30 and 10:00 and arrived just after midnight - we even took time to stop at Wendy's to eat some soquid with a fpoon. First thing done at the cottage? We all changed into swim togs (my mum's expression) and hopped into the lake! It was so lovely! We had one lone beam of light from a flashlight and the stars to light the way. The water was warm, and it was just what the doctor ordered. Then it was time to light a fire, relax and take in some of the peace and quiet before hitting the hay, which was an adventure in an of itself seeing as all three of us ladies were sharing a double bed. It worked out well once we worked out a nice spooning order!

The next morning, us ladies woke up early and starting chatting about everything and nothing. Ok, who am I kidding, we talked about the same old: relationships and poo. ha! Once we left the room, I went straight to the lake and went for a swim. In my opinion that's one of the best ways to wake up. Breakfast consisted of blueberry pancakes and real maple syrup, and after that it was time to just sit and enjoy the sunshine on the dock while we waiting for Mark and Christine (former LR members who have just moved to Huntsville) with baby Max. That was awesome. We all got a chance to sit by the dock,and get some sun. In fact, some of us got a little too much because, well, let's put it this way Karl sure looked like he was wearing a pink shirt. :) We also went for some good swims - the standard one being a run across the lake because it only took about 10 minutes, not even. We would swim, sit on the opposite dock, talk about serious things and then come home, and then we would repeat it later on.

Dinner on Saturday was also really nice, we had burgers and salad and we broke bread together like one big happy family. It was nice to just relax. After dinner, Mark and Christine left and Jason came for the rest of the weekend. That was fun. We casually watched some of Justin's DVD rental "The Long Way Round" and hung out. We played cards and drank beers and enjoyed the evening before retiring.

Sunday morning, breakfast was a little more halfhazard, consisting of muffins and fruit. A few people got up early and were singing worship songs and having some God time by the dock. Someone suggested that we do some church, which was a really good idea and much needed because some tension was starting to breed in because of sarcasm and close living quarters. Luckily someone came up with the best possible idea - an encouragement circle. We all sat around, took some time to spread some love and to pray for everyone. It was so nice to feel appreciated and to talk positively for a while. After that it was a late lunch, more swimming and then we all crashed out and watched Batman Begins while Rob (and Rachel) made delicious fish stew for dinner. It was lovely to break bread together, all sitting around the table. We decided undertake a game of Balderdash, which Rob S and I won (WOOT!). And we were about to retire to bed when the clouds lifted just enough to get to see the stars. So a bunch of us went to the dock, lit sparklers and sat under blankets looking at the sky.

Monday morning was more getting ready to go than anything else. We did one last swim across the lake, had breakfast, packed up and left the cottage by 1 pm. It was a easy drive back to the city, none of us really wanted to go back, but it's nice that it was an easy drive. By the time it was all done, we were safe, sane and still single - and all the better for a lovely weekend away.

P.S. Rachel, I am SO in.

The new sunglasses

I love these. Good sunnies make me happy, and my eyes happy too. p.s. Thanks to Martine for the great pics taken on Olympic Island.

Back to some semblance of normality

The move is officially done. I am now living near Boystown, subletting my friend Kate's place. And although it is only a temporary move, I've gotta say I am just glad to have it over with. The move when off even more smoothly than I though. I couldn't believe it. I was petrified of three things: 1) driving a cube truck in Toronto, 2) not having enough man power to get moved quickly and 3) not having enough room to dump my stuff while subletting. All I can say is that the worrying was all for naught. I had no trouble with the truck at all, I had plenty of loving help getting the move done (Thanks Enoch, Coatesy, Anne Marie and Jon!) and there is more than enough room at the new place to store all my boxes.

Next step, finding a new place for September. No stress. It will happen. God obviously provides. Maybe I can find a new hip downtown pad just for me. That would be awesome. Baby steps.

Work is good too, feels a little strange to be back after a break. They changed the lights here, and I felt so weird to be walking in this morning. I kept thinking something was different until someone tipped me off. I managed to survive the day only being minimally affected by the almost inevitable feeling of stupidity that comes on after a break from the daily grind- you know, that time you need to relearn work mode - and I was actually quite productive today. Productive enough to get stuff done before writing on my blog. :)

Yes, friends, she's back in the game.

Butterflies on the subway

Ever just have one of those delightful moments when things are just understood between you and someone else? Love those. In fact, I had one just the other day on the subway. I was coming home from meeting with my spiritual director. I got on at St. George and sat down. I happen to just glance over and see a rather cute boy sitting in the juxopposite seat. I did a double take/lingering look. I tried to make it look casual. Apparently it wasn't casual enough because the gentleman sitting next to said boy happened to notice me looking, he smiled at me and went back to his newspaper.

Just before getting to Bathurst, the cute boy stood up and moved toward to door. To get there, he had to pass me, so I moved my bag to let him go by. He quietly said "Thank you", and I said "You're welcome". There was a small moment. I could feel the cute boy was looking at me as the train was coming to a stop. I'm certain I blushed, but still couldn't bring myself to stare right back at him. I just locked my eyes on the floor. I barely stole a glance just as the boy stepped off the train (and out of my life). At that moment, the gentleman reading his newspaper looked directly at me again and said "Why'd you let him get away?" I blushed, smiled and laughed.

It was a moment.

Broken Bloc Fiest Raising Woot!

Karl, you are officially my favourite person of the weekend. Yes, the weekend only. ;)

Why?

Well, because on Friday after work I got a phone call that set me in a great mood. Karl called and told me he had a free ticket for me to go see the concert on Olympic Island on Saturday. Wow! Let me see...spend the day packing or got see Fiest, Bloc Party and Broken Social Scene...hmm...Yeah, no contest. (Please note this news came just before I got the internet back - uh, heck ya!)

So, as you can guess, Saturday turned out to be a very good day. I woke up in the morning, went to see an apartment, came home and organized getting my ticket from my friend Martine. That turned out really well, because I went just at brunch time, and we had pancakes, and spend a few minutes chatting, it was awesome. After I got my ticket and arranged the meeting time for the concert, I headed home and did a little bit of packing. It was good, fairly productive, though I realize now that I totally missed an afternoon BBQ I was supposed to go to...oops, nothing serious. Then the concert crew, consisting of myself, Martine, Lisa L. and Martine's brother Phil and his gf Becca were off to the ferry so we could take in the concert. Karl was already over there seeing as he was filming the event (the whole reason the ticket was free) and we got to see him briefly before we found a great little niche to sit and watch Fiest. Very cool, very laid back. She sang beautifully seeing as she was complaining of having a terrible flu. Then we managed to score even better seats to watch Bloc Party and BSS on a slight incline. Bloc Party was great! We danced and enjoyed the summer sun. After a small food break, it was time for BSS! They were so good too. It's my first time seeing them live, and it was sooo worth it. They played until almost 11! Wow! So good.

After the show was over, and we had the necessary bathroom run, we all headed over to the beach for a few minutes. Marty took some great photos of Lisa, Becca and I swinging, and such. It was so nice to have sand on our feet and to feel free of the business of Toronto. Then we got on the ferry, interestingly enough, right next to Amy Milan and the entire band/horn section. hehehe. Very cool again.

Overall, one of my better summer Toronto Saturdays. And all thanks to Karl.

(giggly voice) I like you, Karl, hehehe.

Just tired

It seems I can't get enough sleep lately. I constantly find myself dozing on the subway, kind of embarassing if you ask me, and I don't sleep enough at night. Tonight after work, I went to sleep for what was supposed to be 30 min, more like 3 hrs. I haven't eaten yet, I'm getting an internet fix, then packing then bed again. I feel awful physically, and more awful mentally because I'm letting down JKKB on their very last show. I just can't muster the energy. Awful.

An Incovenient Truth

I went to see this movie last night, thanks to my friend Karl, who treated a whole bunch of us. I suggest that all of you see it. It's a well made movie, and it doesn't come over quite as heavy handed as you would think. Rather, it's a really interesting scientific and political look into the issue of global warming. Some of the facts discussed are just astonishing, and I pray that we do see the truth of the matter and all start to do something about it.

One can walk for miles on ones own, but if there are people following along too, it makes it all the more bearable. The same goes for daunting tasks like saving this planet. Sure, it's a huge undertaking, but loosing our one and only earth shouldn't be a sacrifice made to laziness and ingnorance. If we all make small changes, they will add up. History proves this. One person's step out in faith can start a revolution if others see the worth in undertaking it. Look at Ghandi.

Let's start praying with our feet for change.

Sad update.

Aaron Kelly passed away last Thursday.

May God bless his family and friends.

No woman, no cry.

Sorry loyal readers, I am once again behind in my updates. This time if for another reason. Alas, I do not currently have internet in my home. (NNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOO!!!!) Yes, it's true, I am without my daily internet cocktail consisting of MSN Messenger, Gmail emails, Blogger, Flickr, and MySpace. I call this cocktail "Time Waster". At least I can blog from work on my breaks.

My friends were right, once I did have a life, now I just have a computer and a modem.

Little girl

Thank heaven for being someone's little girl.

This week at home has been a really nice treat. Although I have done a lot of socializing outside, I'm really glad to be able to come home to Mum and Dad at night. Sometimes you just need that. It's nice to walk in a have a little congratulatory 'prezzie' waiting for you along with a packet of red licorice (my fav!).

Also, Mum bought some of my favourite foods to BBQ - lamb and steak. I've had a very comfy bed to sleep in, and I've got a great garden to sit in. It's surprising how much I find I have a love/hate relationship with Toronto. I love it when I'm there, but I hate the concrete. That's another element. KW has fresh air... and grass. And it's still considered getting fresh air when you're drinking on a patio, rather that smogginess. It's lovely. Plus, Mum's garden is a treat to be in. It's got lots of lovely flowers. Sigh.

It's just funny, you know, coming back home. No matter how old you get, how independent you want to feel, there is always a part of you that can be charmed by having someone care for you. Maybe that's part of what we're all searching for, something to replace the sense of home. Until I find it, I'm gonna enjoy every minute of having a "Mummy" and "Daddy".

Goodbye for now Ryan!

Ryan should be off to Europe today. Gonna miss you, kid. Take care of you, and let me know what you're up to and how you're doing.

God bless!

Adventures in Tetris land

This week is just getting crazier and crazier. To recap, I'm in Waterloo with my team, getting to know them, and was hopefully going to attend some meetings. Alas, turns out that's not really happening. There was a "crisis" my regular job site. And by crisis, I meant a pipe bursting launching stagnant water into the call centre.

(insert Mike Myers Scottish accent here) Toronto douwn! Toronto douwn!

So, what does that mean for me? It means I got the lovely priveledge of hopping back on the phones for part of the day, and it means that things are just a little bit hectic. Sigh.

Adventures it is.

A crushtastic weekend

It's been a crazy weekend. Lots of fun stuff going on and lots of sleep. Starting this past Thursday, I volunteered doing FOH (front of house) stuff for Queen's Players Toronto's The OCSI. Very fun show, and it's just nice to be out with the Playaz again (especially because they are all so crushtastic!) Thursday was opening night, and although I wish there could have been more audience participation, I think everything went quite well.


Friday was a very busy day - it's was Ryan's last day at work. Wow, everyone is really going to miss that kid. It was gifts, coffees, and food galore at the office (yes, Derek, I did get another cookie). I've gotta admit it was a little hard to stay on track with everything work wise, seeing as I was also being Ryan's social convener and secretary. Grr. Alas, it all worked out really well. After the work day was done, we went and had a few drinks and some food next door at the Firkin, and it was overall a very good night. (Ugh, I'm gonna miss that kid).

Saturday I slept in and spent the rest of the day packing up my kitchen stuff while watching my taped episode of of Ultimate Fighter 3. (p.s. I can't believe how the first semi-final fight went down. My Canadian boy wussed out. Oooh that makes me mad. At least it was a good fight up until the end. Hope next week is less disappointing). The evening was spent doing FOH for Playaz again. Lots of fun! The show was really good, much bigger audience, bigger laughs all topped off with a trip to Mel's for Moutine (meat poutine). Ok, please note, I did not go the mout route, I went just shared a poutine with a friend - we might have even shared a moment. ;) Sigh.

Today has been pretty relaxed. I slept in again, seeing as I went to bed at 3:30 am it's justified, and packed my bags for KW. Yep, she's home for a week. I've got meetings in Waterloo for work, and I'm excited about meeting the team. It was nice to even get picked up in Toronto by my colleagues, two of which I was meeting in person for the first time. Very cool.

I'll keep you posted on the week of crazy Kay-dub fun.

Summer Toronto Urban Hipster FTers.

Tonight was a random evening spent with my urban hipster Freedomize pals. After a quick dinner and jaunt to Honest Ed's to get more Rubbermaid containers for packing, I hopped on my bike and met up with Andrew and Jason for a few oh-so-covert beers on the side of the road. Yes, we sat near Oakwood and St.Clair (there is a school park there) and drank German beer out of travel mugs. We just enjoyed sitting outside. We were all actually meetin up to go to a prayer meeting at Rachel's with a few other peeps. No sense in going sober to that kind of thing. ;)

Just as we were about head over, Lisa the knitter and hipster supreme rode by on her assbike, and took a minute to sit down with us. She was admittedly a little tipsy too from a Physics shinding. Aha! I love Freedomizers.

Finally we sauntered over to Rachel's and enjoyed her treats of cheese and crackers and tons of awesome German chocolate. Then we chatted some and prayed some. Then I hopped on my bike and rode home. It was great.

I love my church.

Gone golfin'

Work has been fun lately. I've been learning lots, trying to get into the groove of what can and can't be done to accomodate people, and learning the new computer programs. Somehow, I've managed to get two free lunches and a some other free goodies over the last few days. I swear, I really am becoming Ryan 3.0 (one better than a replacement). Just kidding. I could never step into Ry's shoes, at least not without using tons of TP!

Speaking of Ryan, my trainer has been working really hard this week. (Note: dripping sarcasm). Hard enough that he ended up golfing this past Monday and I was left to my own devices. Just as well, I learned a lot by getting on with things myself, and I think Ryan very much welcomed the break. He's been really thinking outside the office lately, and understandably so. If I was about to pack up for two months in Europe in about a week's time, my mind would be elsewhere too. Coupled with leaving the company all together, heck, I don't know that I would even make it in! Ha! What's even funnier is that he was accidentally deleted from the office system, so even if he wanted to, he can't really do much work. Maybe he planned it...Golfing? Hacking is more like it.

Honestly, I've gotta admit, I'm not sure that I could ever really follow in Ryan's steps. There more time I'm around him, the more I notice just how much of a positive impact this crazy kid has had on this office. Wow. He's leaving broken hearts everywhere. Like I mentioned once before, Ryan is a golden kid. Seldom will you find such a youngin with such a good head. I know it's going to be huge when he leaves, and well, I know I will miss him dearly. For really.

So, Ryan, I'm gonna miss you kid. Lots of love!

A moment for a life I once knew

Friends, today I want to take a moment to reflect on an a tragic accident that has happened, involving a friend and classmate of mine from back in Labrador. His name is Aaron Kelly. He was one of my first crushes, the boy who had the guts to dress up like Garth for Halloween, and the boy who inspired me to listen to Weezer. Although I haven't seen or talked to him in about seven years, the events have hit home, and I don't know what else to do but shed a tear, and take a moment.

Aaron has been teaching in Korea for about year now, along with another girl from Labrador City. About two weeks ago, I got word that he had a very serious fall from a cliff and was critically injured. News has been spotty, but what I have managed to piece together is that he was apparently running/walking in the street and fell through some sort of gap and landed on a concrete culvert. Either way, he sustained serious head injuries as was brought to hospital to be stabilized and has been in a coma. Late last week, I heard that luckily his parents and good friend has managed to make it out there from Lab City to be by his side. Alas, new also followed that things took a turn for the worst, and all brain activity ceased (if there was any to begin with). Last I heard, his parents chose to have the nutrition and medications keeping him alive. The vigil remains to see if and when he has passed, which most likely happened this past weekend. I have yet to hear more.

So, please, I beg of you all, pray for his family and for the rest of his soul. God has his reasons for this, and I firmly believe He is in control. I just wish...Aaron would be 25 on Decemeber 29th. He is exactly two months younger than me. It's all so surreal. I don't know what to think or feel.

I shall just shed a tear and say a prayer.

Catching up (with a head cold)

My weekend has been overshadowed with the fact that I now officially have a head cold. No fun. It just sort of attacked me this afternoon. Yuck. Right after my lovely catch up brekkie with my friend Kris Dymetrenko, whom I haven't seen since 3rd year at Queen's. Turns out he's in town and living in my hood. Sweet. Went to a dinner party, ate lots, and made it home ok. Ready to hit the hay, but feel a little bad (and slightly relieved) I decided to be sensible and not go to another party after the dinner party.

Everynow and then I make good decisions.

Packing sucks the big one

One sure fire way to realize (quickly) just how much shit you can collect over a two year span is to move house. It's awful. I'm constantly finding more things I want to get rid of, but the minute I do there is something else in my way. And tonight I had to go through 2 Rubbermaid boxes until I could find one to fit all my CDs and movies. Yikes. I've got a lot of those. I haven't even started on books yet, which is not so bad...but in the back of my head I'm always reminded that the other half of them are currently residing in KW. At least I've got month to get things straightened out, and then I can look forward to a newer, bigger place. (The only major dissapointment in that department of late is that the apartment below my friend Rachel is no longer coming available in September. I've gotta search for something good in the meantime).

On a lighter note, things are picking up at work. It's nice to hear Ry tell me that I'm doing a good job at catching on quickly, though it does still feel slightly strange to be sitting at his desk, answering emails and such like he used to. Wow. I'm becoming more growed up. :)

I'm glad the weekend is coming up - I've got to squeeze in more packing, but I think it'll be ok. That and I would like to sleep a little too. I've got a mini cold that's just plain annoying, especially coupled with allergies.

Boo on it all.

The Gem

Monday nights, those of us who live in 'da hood' have started a tradition to meet at the local little hole-in-the-wall pub to have a few drinks and to chat. This past week was the first week that I was able to go, and interestingly one of the first nights that nobody showed up. Just as well, because Nick and I got a great chance to catch up over a pint. And we also took a minute to take silly pics with beer using Nick's phone. We are Gems afterall.


I realize that I'm really going to miss Nick when he heads back to Calgary. We've lived in the same house now for almost 2 years now, and well, gosh darn it if I don't just love the kid. He's like my big brother, and he keeps me sane. Guess now I've just a good excuse to go out west.

Pimp out to Nick.

Practical matters

Started day one of the new job today - I think it went relatively well, even with the added stress of the TTC strike this morning. Grr. Hiss. Boo.

Have become relatively obsessesed with putting pictures on Flickr. Check 'em out.

I am tired, bed time.

Like an inside joke

Sometimes I think knowing God is like being a part of a really great inside joke. He gets me in certain ways, in fact, He knows me better than I know myself. There are moments where you just see things happen and you know it can't be a coincidence. I find myself then laughing or pointing at the sky saying "Tricky!". And I'm not angry, I want to do nothing else but smile. This weekend I totally felt like it was one of those moments.

Most of my Saturday was spent running around doing errands, but it started to slow down in the evening when I went to see X-Men 3 with Karl. After that I was scheduled to go to a karaoke party with some of the people from Queen's Players Toronto. Now, I must admit part of me was kinda leery about going because I know that I have the tendency to let my "wild side" creep out when I'm around these people - mostly because they all remember me as that girl from Queen's. I went anyway, going with a "be good" look from Karl. And here comes the smile - lately I've been really weak at defending my wild side and so I just paused and asked for strength, and just like that I went into the Gladdy. And things were great - I talked with my newly wed friends about the value of marriage commitments and I chatted with friends and I spent most of the night bonding with two girls and not being a flirty bad girl. It was brilliant. Furthermore, at the end of the night I had a long convo about God with a good friend, and came home to some amazingly encouraging words on my blog comments from Ericka. Wow. It was like God saw my heart, but ran with things.

Today has been great too - I walked to church, and as I walked in the sun, I couldn't help but feel overwhelmed with God's love. It was great. Everything made me smile, and I took a moment to reflect on some of the work He's asked me to do. And just like that, God answered some more fears during church. Amazing.

I like being on the inside.

Disturbing fact of the day

Did you know...the average woman's thighs are one and a half times larger in circumference than the average man's.

Weird.

Countdown to UFC 60 - Hughes vs. Gracie

Little known fact - I am totally into UFC thanks to my roomie Nick. This weekend is a HUGE fight between the most dominating fighter in UFC history, Matt Hughes, and a pioneer in the sport and ju jitsu expert, Royce Gracie. I'm so torn. I've got about 3 different place to be that night. Anyone gonna have pay per view at their house and want to tape it for me just in case?

Waiting for an "arranged" marriage???

Recently my friend Tom posted on his blog about the seemingly huge preoccupation that Christians of a certain age have about getting married. Makes you think. I agree that it is very true of many of us younguns at FT and even other Christian communites I've been around. So many of us are wanting to find that one true relationship and end up projecting vibes like "Love me! Love me" or "Are you my significant other?" onto others. Is this a good thing? Is this a bad thing? It's hard to say.

For a long time I know I was reluctant to even acknowledge that I want to be a wife. I've talked about this before. Now that I do know it is something I want to be prepared for, I feel even more confused. What does it mean to be looking for the one? How will I know my husband when I meet him? I've been so wrong in the past. And for me, that's a HUGE sticking point. Twice in my life have I ever been "sure" about dating someone, in the sense that I knew that I was meant to date them. Interestingly enough, these boys were my first and seconds loves, but still it went wrong in the end. Hindsight 20/20, although very good at the time, my surety was based in infatuation. I left no room for God to work, I didn't want to admit that I could be wrong.

Is it possible that we do place too much emphasis on kismet or romantic notions of cosmic proportions? Are we so seduced by relationships depicted in movies and books that we are closing ourselves off the the possibilities that exist? I often think about this. Mind you, I have very little experience dating within Christian circles, but still. I find myself noticing a certain element of hypersentivity in Christian dating and I am uncertain if it is well founded. What I mean is that it seems to me that many of us are putting ourselves "out there" but we're not ready to accept the consequences of that, or even more simply we are not ready for the follow through. It's almost a sense of feeling that we are all waiting for the proverbial lightening bolt or fireworks to strike before we admit that God might have a hand in a relationship. It's is this "quick start, quick end" approach that confuses me.

I do acknowledge that it is very unfair to cause your Christian brother or sister to stumble or to cause them to be diverted from their path because of an ill-timed romantic sensibility. I am no suggesting that one should drag on dating until you are beating a dead horse. Rather, I'm wondering if we are too quick to throw in the towel because we are so untrusting of the sensation "being in love" - we want to pass it off as infatuation and we don't allow the seeds of deep caring love to form at all. Simply, sometimes it seems like "this person is my friend, let's hang out, not my wife, let's be friends again". How are we so sure?

Yet, I also consider the other side of the coin. I do whole-heartedly believe that God must have His hand in our romantic relationships. Christian marriage is serious. It is marriage to one person for life, and a promise that is made at the feet of God himself. Messing with that is not something I want to do. So, yes, we have to make sure that we listen to God as well. He is the one who designed me to love - manifested as both "being in love" and as long-term promise keeping love. Amen for that.

I guess in the end all I can do is admit that I don't have the answers. I don't know what God has in store for me - I may be a wife next year, I may be one when I'm 52, or I may never be one. Who knows but Him who would have me do His will? I figure sticking with Him is my best way to find out what is arranged for me.

Miami Inked

I've decided that I think it would be worth flying down to Miami just to get tattooed at Miami Ink. Really, those people are so talented. I should be so lucky as to make it on the Chris Garber wait list. Wow. And Kat Von D - totally tattoo babe. If only I had more guts, I would look like that.

Sigh.

Bestest friend date

Had dinner tonight with Andrew at the Drake. It was nice to be able to meet after work and it be a decent hour. Andrew and I talked about quite a few things - it was a good chance to just talk seeing as we haven't had a friend date in a long time. QT with AJHR. Excellent.

I can't believe we've been friends for seven years now and we haven't killed and/or married each other yet. Ha! Luckily neither of those options are currently on the books. :) Good thing...Ericka might kick my ass!

Even if you're not reading the internet lately, I still say thanks Andrew. You're awesome, fatty, though you're not quite as innocent as you seem. hehehe.

Party time! Excellent!

Today was again pretty chill - much needed after the excitement of last week. I made a start on some packing, and managed to throw away from more crap that I don't need. Next step is getting it out of the house. I want it gone!

The rest of the afternoon was spent watching Wayne's World with my friend Lisa. As it turns out, she's just a huge a fan as I am, and we spent a good few minutes quoting the movie even before it started. Oh the hilarity. Such quotes as:

"A gun rack? A gun rack. I don't even own a gun , let alone many guns that would necessitate an entire rack."

"She will be mine. Oh yes. She will be mine."

"Garth, marriage is punishment for shoplifting in some countries!"

"I still live with my parents, which I admit is both bogus and sad."

and our personal favourite:

"I once thought I had mono for a whole year. Turns out I was just really bored."

It was expecially enjoyable to watch with Lisa because she grew up in Chicagoland, so she gets all the references to that, and well, coming from Canada, I get a lot of the Canadian reference that Mike Myers throws in. Sigh. What a good movie.

(thumbs up) "Zang".

Lost boys (and girls)

This weekend has almost officially been devoted to reconnecting with long lost friends - and if that isn't the theme, I would have to go with boys, seeing as I've spent more time with boys than girls this weekend. Yup, pretty funny - it's been sleep, lazing and hanging with boys. Oh, that's funny now that I think about it. "Shifty".

On Friday night, I had dinner with my friend Jared who I haven't seen in almost two years. Not suprising seeing as he's been teaching in Lithuania for a year. We originally met a church in Waterloo called The Embassy about 4 or 5 years ago now, and we've managed to stay in touch off and on since then. It was really nice to just be able to chat in person, in the same city, heck, on the same continent even. He's a very cool person, so that made it even more of a pleasure. After the dinner, I ended up watching Napoleon Dynamite with my friend David, which was also good. I enjoy that movie for it's sheer quotable quality. "I caught you a delicious bass!" :) I even managed to catch up with Ryan over the phone that night - the poor kid got his wisdom teeth taken out last Tuesday and then had an adverse reaction to the meds he was on. Brutal. Here's to hoping he's better.

Saturday was a pretty chill day - I organized a meeting with a guy I sorta knew from Labrador City named Donny Swanson. We connected via MySpace, and he's been living in Ontario for about as long as I have now. It was kind of surreal, but we had a good afternoon downtown just hanging out. A highlight was going into the new Apple store in the Eaton Centre. I treated myself to a new remote/FM radio transmitter for my iPod. The rest of the time was spent walking and chatting. It was nice to be able to talk about stuff from back "home" with someone who actually knows what I am talking about. We talked about "the lights" (there is only one street light in Lab West) and about the nasty bars. It was fun. All in all, a successful venture. After that I spent an evening having excellent sushi at Fujiyama with my friend Karl, which we then followed up with a viewing of the movie X-men. It was a good way to get excited about the X-Men 3.

Today has been pretty chill - had brunch with the girls upstairs and then went to set up for church. David rocked the sermon tonight with an excellent talk about 1 Corinthians 9:24-27, and Colin led some great worship. I nipped out early though, cause I hopped the GO train to Pickering to have some food and drinks with my friends Al and Jen and Kate from Queen's plus their respective significant others Scott, Shaun and Jeff. It was a lovely evening - I haven't seen these people in ages. I got to see Al's rock and to finally meet Jen's squeeze. I think the most interesting part was my long involved philisophical/theological debate with Scott - it's true, he does just keep going on any point. Ha! In the end of it all I urged him to read Mere Christianity and to give me feed back on that. hehehe.

Now I must be off to bed. Too many late nights, not enough sleep lately.

Set on random

The goal: Put your music library on shuffle and answer the questions with songs in the order they come up. Interesting. High five to Lisa for beating me in doing this.

1. What's my mood like right now?
Feel Good Lost Reprise - Broken Social Scene
2. How's tomorrow going to be for me?
Losing Lisa - Ben Folds
3. What kind of person am I?
Come Here Boy - Imogen Heap (ahahaha...aha...ha...)
4. Am I loved?
These Eyes - The Guess Who
5. How can I achieve my highest potential?
Big Dumb Rocket - Our Lady Peace
6. What should I do with my life?
I'm Still Your Fag - Broken Social Scene
7. Is everything really going to be alright in the end?
All Alone - The Gorillaz
8. What is my best quality?
Falling Into You - Turn Off the Stars (oohh..that's cool)
9. How does my sex life look?
I Put A Spell On You - Nina Simone (oooh...another cool one)
10. What's the meaning of life?
One - U2
11. What do people think of you?
Cover Me - Björk
12. Would I make a good catch?
I'm Willing - Ben Lee (hehehe - but NOT that way)
13. How crazy am I?
Union City Blues - Blondie
14. Will I have a good life in general?
Some Hope For Us - Eden Ants (interesting...)
15. Can this (insert person here) ever really love me?
So Here We Are - Bloc Party (dumb question)
16. Can me and every guy out there ever be more than friends?
Numblock Ft. Skuff - Ill Seer
17. What's going to happen to me this week?
Little Girl - Death From Above 1979
18. Where will I be a year from now?
Can't Stop Now - Keane
19. What is my biggest wish?
Anthems For A Seventeen-Year-Old Girl - Broken Social Scene
20. What is the love of my life doing at this very moment?
Meet You On The Other Side - Cuff the Duke (deep...hehehe...Jesus is my boyfriend...)
21. How will I die?
Gyasi Went Home - Bedouin Soundclash
22. What will happen after I die?
Livin Godly (Refrain) - Ill Seer (now, that's REALLY cool)

fangirl

According to Urban Dictionary, a fangirl is:

fangirl, n. 1. (derogatory) a female fan, obsessed with something (or someone) to a frightening or sickening degree. Often considered ditzy, annoying and shallow. 2. (playful, good-natured) less extreme, a female fan who can laugh at their own passion for their particular interest (or even obsession).

I happen to think that I am a good example of fangirl type 2 when it comes to Mr. Ben Folds. A little while ago I became an official fan club member, and today I got my membership card, letter and official signed photo in the mail.


In other words, I got my some swag - doesn't it look nice with my Ben sweatshirt that I got at his last concert?

Oh Benny, how I enjoy thee.

WOOT!

Apparently I did do well in the interview....well enough that they offered me the job!

Time to breathe again

Just had the interview with the "big boss" here. I think it went pretty well. She's very down to earth and I really like her. We'll see what the other "boss" thinks.

Relax. Breathe.

In limbo

These days I've been feeling like I'm in a bit of a transitional state. I'm not quite sure what's happening, but I know my life is headed in a new direction. For now, I'm just going to sit in "limbo".

Firstly, I've applied for a new position here at work, and I'm waiting to hear back about it. I would love to have this job, it would be a solid new challenge, but of course, I'm still a relative "newbie" to the company, and we're going to have to see what the powers that be say. In the end, I'm just honoured to have gotten this far. Apparently I was one of only a few candidates to get an interview, and that's pretty good as far as I'm concerned. As much as I would like I new challenge, I've got remember to just be still and accept circumstances as they come. But all the same - here's hoping!

Secondly, I officially moving as of the end of next month. I'm going to sublet my good friend Kate's place while she's at home in Winnepeg and I'm looking forward to it immensely. She currently lives with a good friend of mine from Queen's, and I think it'll be really nice to get a chance to bond with him again. Plus, it's a total change of scenery and that's probably going to be the most welcome part. I've been in my current house for almost two years now, and I'm ready to live somewhere different, to have a more grown-up place. It's time.

I'm thinking I'm just restless again, but it ok, because things change, and I'm ok with that.

Quid pro quo

Humour takes on many forms, but I must confess myself I am particularly attracted to what is called a "witty repartee" or a "quid pro quo". Athough certain natural occurences can be funny, mostly when they are incongruous, I am just partial to what a repartee inspires. It allows you to be quick thinking and clever, and to have a wide base of knowledge. Generally, it's about thinking fast and furiously.

I have to admit today I've been confronted with several moments like these. In fact, I pretty much would have to say that my friend Ryan, just like my friend Coatesy, have really managed to master the quick thinking one-liners. I don't know how they do it, but I love the challenge that talking to them inspires. Today I had the chance of meeting another collegue and he seemed to be on the same track as Ryan. All in all the conversations I have had with them today been a highlight.

And if you don't believe me, just ask your mom.

Will and Grace

Sometimes it's hard to find the will to be graceful when it comes to relating to other people. I'm noticing that lately I haven't been graceful enough in my relating to others, which it stupid because I expect them to be graceful when it comes to me. It's a double standard, and we all know that I hate double standards. So, friends, I promise to try my best and to treat you all with more love and understanding. That's the least I can do. It's not easy when I'm so willing to just get angry, or even harsh.

Just be graceful with me, I'll be graceful with you.

Saturday Night Fever

Today was a lazy crazy Saturday. I spent a good chunk of the morning sleeping (unintentionally) and then I got up and started "the purge" of my room. It was good. I managed to get rid of bunch of crap that I don't need anymore, though I still have tons of stuff to get rid of. Baby steps. Then I spent some time talking to friends on the phone and we came up with a plan of action for tonight. I also kicked around the mall a little, waiting to get some ancient films developed - I finally have the pics of me graduating from Jets Go. Wow.

So, to the plans for the evening - so good. I planned to meet Rachel, Rob and David in Little Italy to have some eats and drinks. We had originally planned to go to Kalendar, but it was full so we ended up at another little pizzeria. We had wine, we challenged each other with skill testing questions - "There is a man lying dead in the middle of the desert with one shoe lace untied, how did he die?" It was good. Then Roshan came to meet up with us and we went on to get some delicious ice cream/gelato. Yum.

What next you ask? We did the most mature thing we could think of - we decided to go swinging and playing on the jungle gyms in Trinity Bellwoods park. It was hilarious, even if we all felt a little naseous at some point. Rob was the funniest because it took him three swing to be practically over the top pole - sometimes having long legs pays off. I can't tell you how much fun it was to just be spontaneous, act like a kid and have a blast. We've gotta hook up a game of spotlight. I swear by it.

Frickin' Karl.

I want happy teeth

Since Wednesday, I've been learning all about dental information for work. It's kinda fun, but at the same time it makes me think about the fact that I haven't been to the dentist in ages. Oh my! It'll be good. I've heard that there are some good places to go in Toronto. It's strange having to find a new dentist though, seeing as I totally love my dentist in Kitchener. You go in there, and they are super nice, and the building is awesome. They talk to you about what treatment is going on, and my dentist even knows that my teeth are sensitive so I require some extra local anesthetic if drilling is required. It's good. Also, everyone in the office is good looking. It's almost surreal, but I swear, it's true. It's the Stepford Dentists and Oral Hygienists (except not creepy).

Anyone got a good replacement here in the T-dot?

Jesus is my boyfriend

Is that the greatest Christian culture T-shirt slogan?

Seriously. I love it. More so I can't believe it exists somewhere.

New challenge, friends. I want you to post the cheesiest Christianese slogan you've heard recently. We can even have a competition. The person with the best slogan will be awarded with a special post all about them winning.

Do it.

FOLLOW UP - Apparently, you really can date Jesus - um...I'm not sure how I feel about that.

Too good at the game

Warning - this post might come off sounding a little self centered, it is not meant that way.

Tonight I had a couple of quick chances to "exercise" a muscle that I haven't really been using a lot lately - my flirting muscle. And as nice and as innocent as it was, it made me once again realize one thing - I'm too good at the game. Really. I can come, play and conquer if need be. I can twist wills and create illusions. I can up the ante while completely bluffing. I can do it with ease. It's scary.

I'm tired of it.

I just wanna be real.

Negativity sucks

I was watching a show today, and the person on it was just so negative about everything that it really began to tick me off (it's tiring) but it also made me feel sad for the person. If I'm getting tired just listening, doesn't that person get fed up with themselves? I think it would be just so unbearable to spend my life doing nothing but complaining and feeling like crap. I own that I do my share, but I'd like to think I'm relatively positive.

Ugh.

Negativity sucks.

Pondering the arguments of an atheist (Part One)

Recently on the Colbert Report, Stephen Colbert interviewed Sam Harris, an atheist author, and listening to the interview made me ponder a few of the motivations behind atheism and some of the points that Harris made. (You can view the interview here). In other words, I'm wondering, is there any truthiness in atheism?

First, let me stipulate I am not about to set out on a rant here so that I may convert my readers, I simply want to ponder some of points of atheism from a Christian perspective (though from a less over-the-top manner than Colbert). The aim therefore is a point-counterpoint type review of what was said, adding in a few extra Christian views - it's my personal bias, I'm stating it up front.

The first point that Harris brought up was the idea that all of us understand what it means to be an atheist because we are all atheists when it comes to Poseidon. Anyone who still believe in this Greek god is considered a "lunatic". He further added that Christians are atheists when it comes to the beliefs of other religions. Interesting. In my experience, there is nothing in my Christian beliefs that teaches me not to believe in the merit of other religions. In fact, in studying world religions, I was often struck by how much of God is in them. I may not, however, believe that Jesus is the way, but it doesn't mean I'm not listening for God in other ways.

Harris stated that one of the main sticking points for him is that each religion makes incompatible claims about their own deity, making the point that the Koran says that anyone who believe in Jesus is destined for hell. He also specifically pointed out that is is these differences in ideals that are responsible to for the violence of this world. Although, I can see his point as I too believe that some religious zeal has lead to some unecessary wars, I find it impossible to blame them solely on relgious beliefs. Religion is only a scapegoat because people don't want to admit that there is such a thing as free will. Just as guns don't kill people, people kill people - God doesn't kill people, people kill people. We are responsible for the actions we choose to take, and if we are using religion as an excuse to do wrong, it's not right either. Eliminating the human factor skews the reality that humans are fallable. Also, religion does have a political side and it is usually said politics that are the motivating factor for violence and war, people just (sadly) feel use religion as their excuse.

What about the arguement that having faith in God is illogical? This is a common in our scientific world. Harris bring it up and states that we have "good reasons" to believe in scientific discoveries and that it's only when we have "bad reasons" that we turn to the illogical arguement of faith. Personally, I find this is a very narrow contention. Logically, we accept science as fact because we believe in its authority, in other words, we believe it comes from a valid source. Most people cannot see an oxygen atom, but they believe it exists because someone, somewhere has said is real. No more can anyone in this century prove the existance of Napolean Bonaparte, but we believe he existed based on historical books. They accept them based on historical authority. Why then are people so quick to dismiss the Bible's authority? It is illogical to create a double standard because the Bible requires us to have a little faith as well as believe in what is written in it. Also, I do not see faith as a "bad reason", rather it is the only logical explanation to the illogical; it is the evidence of things not seen and the substance of things hoped for.

Pondering the arguements of an atheist (Part Two)

Harris also brought up the point that 44% of America believe that within the next 50 years, Jesus is going to sweep down from the skies and save the world like a superhero. And of course he states this effects the social policies that we create, the wars that are waged and overall define society. Furthermore he states that most people also believe in the "God" who says that martyrdom is a direct to pull to heaven and that condoms are evil. He says that because of the respect for religious authority we cannot call a spade a spade and criticize the church for their sanctions. Isn't that what you've just done, Mr. Harris? But again, the point is being missed. What Harris is arguing about are the dogmas that have been created by the political church. (Political in the sense of being related to the art or science concerned with guiding or influencing governmental body). Christianity and religion in its truest essence should be related to the living God, the Holy Spirit that guides us. As humans we are not designed to exactly understand the ways in which God works in our lives, we can know it by faith. To get stuck in theories and semantics is just silly; it is the same as saying I cannot breathe in oxygen because I do not understand how it is processed by my lungs. People were breathing long before this was understood. But even so, as I mention earlier, people are fallable, and our own dogmas are fallable. Living a Christian (and religious) life is far more than following and criticizing rules, it's accepting that which you cannot see - if we could openly explain it all away of have a concrete set of rules we would be trying to bypass its very function in our lives.

Regardless of the biases any of you readers have, I urge you to consider yourself what you think when it comes to all this. Are we expecting too much to want to have all the "good reasons" ready and available? Personally, I'm glad to accept that I don't know everything and that not everything has an explanation. It's nice to have certain mysteries. I do not go to a play to see the director, as soon as he steps on stage the theatricality is interrupted. In the same way, I do not expect to see God physically in this life because, as C.S. Lewis says, "When the author steps on to the stage the play is over".

Yes, those are church ladies!

A little while ago, on out women's board of FNet (our church website), there was a post about the rather humourous idea that us girl at FT are in fact "church ladies". Somehow this conversation thread morphed into the idea of us outwardly showing our church lady status by having what we dubbed "H&G day" or "Hat and Glove Day" at one of our Sunday services. Last night was the night. A few of us FT women put our best hats forward and had a great time of it!

Roshan totally stole the show with her glam church lady style. Oh, and of course there was Nadine who did the crazy church grandma bit with her cane. Hehehe. Next step church pirates! Yarr!