I've moved!

So, I've picked up my blogging again, but I've decided to jump ship.

Please check out my newest home.

Enjoy!

Today has been an annoyance

Today I've felt totally annoyed all day long - and having a coffee this morning totally didn't help keeping those feelings alive.

Grr.

First off I've had one hell of a day trying to organize my exams for my courses. Mostly what's causing issues is that the coordinator from the invigilation place doesn't seem to understand the word "early". I need to write an exam on the 24th of May, which is causing issues because my good friend Ann Marie is getting married that day at 1:00 pm. So, when I booked the exam I asked to have my 3 hr exam scheduled "early". To them, early means 10:00. Let's do the math. My exam is 3 hrs, starting at 10:00 am means my exam ends at 1:00 pm. Isn't that when Annie's wedding is? GAH! No go. I'm not missing the wedding. Luckily I decided to say "too bad so sad stupid person!" and I booked an exam the day before with another place. (A 10$ difference is a small price to pay for being at the wedding).

Secondly, work has been nuts today. People have just seemed off their rockers and totally doing strange things. I don't get it. It makes me feel like I'm on crazy pills. Really, we're probably all just fine, we've just got a case of the "stupids" when it comes to communicating properly. Sheesh. I hate these days, mostly because I get blamed when stuff goes wrong. Or at least it feel that way. But I won't go on because it's work, and people say I shouldn't blog about work.

Thirdly, I'm restless. And I'm annoyed about that.

Maybe it'll get better one I go home and watch Lost.

Total addiction

Marty and I have spent the last little while getting hooked on the show Lost.  I've never watched an episode before, and well, I'm totally in love.  

Honestly, it's keeping me going until Grey's Anatomy comes back. 

Seriously.

The process

Last night Marty and I spent the evening with our marriage mentoring couple from the Meeting House.  It was a fun evening - they're very nice and fed us very well.  After dinner we sat down to talk about the first few months of marriage - and I've gotta say, this is definitely valuable.  Adjusting to being married is not easy by any stretch of the imagination.  You've got to learn to live with a new roomie - and there are WAY more emotional stakes.  That aside, when you've got other outside stressers (like school) it makes it even harder.  So, Marty and I are both really enjoying having a couple that's been married for a while present us with some good tips and opportunities to talk things out. 

One of the really interesting things we discussed last night was a spin-off idea of one of Bruxy's sermons.  It was the contrast of efficiency and relationship.  Essentially, Bruxy brought up the idea that it's easy to question why God isn't efficient - He's all powerful, so why doesn't He fix everything?  That would be efficient indeed, and the end product would be fantastic, but it wouldn't bring about what's really on God's heart - a relationship with us.  So, God often is willing to "sacrifice" efficiency for relationships.  It's very interesting topic to ponder about and it really made my think about it. 

When I was doing a lot of theatre theory, especially postmodern theory, I often discussed the idea of the process being the art.  Sometimes the end product, the play or piece, isn't the most interesting part.  The process of how the piece was conceived, collaborated on and refined tells a truer tale.  That's the process.  I really truly believe that for me the process is what's important.  Last night, I got to thinking about how this idea of process can be translated into interpersonal relationships, and also with my relationship with God. 

It's easy to get discouraged when the end product that you've been working towards doesn't come out just right.  Perhaps by focusing on how far you've come from point A to point B is what's needs to be taken into consideration.  Those are the actions that are deliberate and most often done in communion.  If I know I'm good at a task and that I can do it efficiently doesn't mean I have to do it all the time if it's at the expense of not involving others.  A guitarist may be totally able to carry on a tune, but it shouldn't come at the expense of the drummer wanting to keep up with him.   

I'm really going to chew on this one for a while - I think it will really help me understand why it is I have to continue to pursue my faith in Christ.  It may be rough and hard at times, but I still keep plugging on.  Although God could make all the answers and pathways clear, He doesn't because this allows me to find Him, to ask Him for help and to move forward in communion with Him.  I'm pursuing the loving, righteous relationship He's always had in mind for us. 

Very cool. 

Feeling closed in!

I feel like I'm getting a little stir crazy - I've been in the house since yesterday and have been working hard on school work. I'm just feeling really insane today.

I want to get out but yet I feel like I've got so much work to do. Yikes! I don't know. Baby steps I guess.

Shopping victoriously!

Yessss!

Yesterday I totally scored one on e-bay!

I've been looking to find a fun pencil skirt that's a modern take-off of the traditional pin-up style. You know the sort of high-waisted totally awesome Rockabilly kinda skirt. I've found a few that I've liked, only bid on one, and loss - until yesterday. I just decided to go for it on this skirt I saw. And I won!

Check out how cute this one of a kind skirt is:

I'm a terrible correspondent!

I've been thinking a lot lately about just how bad of a correspondent (and possibly long term friend) I am.

Let me explain what I mean.

I am a person who loves to meet new people and to forge new friendships.  Trouble is, I'm really bad a staying in touch with people when they aren't in my immediate circle.  For example, my good friends from Jets Go, who I no longer see on an almost daily basis, don't get nearly as many emails and correspondence from me as they should.  Why?  I'm not sure.  I think it's because I get very wrapped up in my immediate circumstances that I forget to send all the emails that I've intented.  Hating talking on the phone at length is also an issue.  I just can't pull off long hour long coversations over the phone like I used to in high school.  I mean, it does happen every now and then, but it's rare.

I ponder about this - mostly because these days I feel like I'm even struggling to keep up with friends in current life circle.  Life has changed a lot.  I planned a wedding, got married and changed where I live.  I've also undertaking 3 university courses that have to be done in a very short amount of time.  I don't have time for my husband, let alone for me and let alone for my friends.  And this bothers me.  

I know, I know.  Most people say "Forget about it!"  and "If they're your real friends, they'll understand".  But how long can I expect them to understand without sending out a little love?  One-sided relationships suck.  For serious.  

I guess I ponder about it because I don't want to be selfish.  I don't want to feel like my friends have to continue to care about me and love me when I'm not doing all in my power to love them.  But then again, right now, all that's in my power is the ability to say "I love you, and still care, I just need to get this shit done first".  

I'm torn.